Mensa Wannabe-er

Greetings all,

Today I did the Mensa Home Prep Test to see if I have a chance at passing the real Mensa test. Mensa is an organization for people who possess the top 2% IQs in the world.

Why the hell would I try out for this organization? Well I've been professing for the past 10 years that I am a genius so I figure I probably should actually put it to the test since I've never taken a real IQ test, only online ones. I think if I don't pass this Mensa prep test, at least maybe I'll take a real IQ to see how smart I am intellectually.

If I pass this Home Prep Test, then I can either submit an IQ test that was supervised or take their monthly supervised tests.

I actually took a bit longer to do it and actually was expecting more math type questions, much like a typical IQ test. There were 6 sections in this test categorized as follows: Synonyms, Classification, Opposites, Analogies, Completion (paragraph missing some words, which you choose from a list of possible words) and Inferences.

I found it was too much word selection and it started messing with my head. I think I did okay but I mailed it back today and will have to wait to see my results. As mentioned earlier, I was disappointed that it didn't have more math questions, because I'd probably be done faster.

I read a book a few years ago entitled Losing Our Minds: Gifted Children Left Behind by Deborah Ruf. It talked about the difficulties these gifted children experience and it also had classifed the various levels of giftedness. I always thought perhaps I was gifted and after reading that book, I concluded that if I am gifted, I am probably on the lowest rung because what some of these kids thought about at a young age was impressive.

I know I am probably smarter then average. I probably seem insecure about my intelligence but the reality is I am. I chose to drop out of my first year university, not because I was doing poorly, in fact I excelled in many of my courses, but because like many people my age, I didn't know what I wanted to major in and I saw little point in investing $4000 to go take something that I was unsure of.

I love learning but I had to say goodbye to the intellectual world because somewhere in my heart I knew what I needed to learn, I could not learn in an academic setting. So I went into the world of work and have struggled to find my place in this world. I long to be a comedian, a performer, an artist.

But I can never get that academic recognition that my nerd heart so desires.

I need to know how smart I am. I know I am not the highest level of genius. Maybe I am not a genius at all. But I need to know how intellectually smart I am.

I think being above average intelligence can have it's drawbacks, which I learned about in Losing Our Minds: Gifted Children Left Behind. Lots of thoughts and ideas about things go through your mind and learning can become an obsession. There is a loneliness as well because sometimes some people are just not smart enough to get what you are saying or understand your ideas.

Over the years I keep looking for smart people to be my friends because at least I take comfort in that. Being around stupid people is just too painful for me.

Even if you are not intellectually minded, being kind and being open to learning is just as fine.