I'm actually going to highlight that which I think is true about me. I have been labelled as a lizard. I like lizards as I think they are cute and I also appreciate their tongue skills.

Maya * Aztec Astrology Report

Introduction - The Astrology of Time
The ancient Maya and Aztec astrologers studied the mysterious influence of the rhythms of the sky on earthly life. Everyone knows the Sun rises and sets every day -- this is the basic rhythm of life around which we set our clocks and calendars. What the ancient astrologers discovered was that other time cycles existed that were multiples of this basic day cycle. This fact was discovered about 100 years ago in Europe and these cycles (there are many of them) are now called biorhythms.

The most important time cycles in ancient Mayan and Aztec astrology are those of the day, 9-days, 13-days, and 20-days. Additionally, years are counted also, in groups of 4 and 13. Each day is then part of several other cycles, so no two days are exactly the same. Your Maya/Aztec horoscope below shows exactly where in each of the cycles you were born. Each category below examines a specific cycle and a specific aspect of your personality. Keep in mind that our personalities are complex and contain many contradictions. All of us present a different "face" depending on who we meet. The delineations below will reflect this, but they will also give you a clear picture of who you really are. The true value of astrology lies in self-knowledge, the first step to wisdom.

Your Most Personal Traits -- The Day-Sign of Your Birth
Here are your strongest and most obvious personality traits. The delineation below describes who you are and how you appear to others, at least on the surface. In Aztec astrology this part of is your horoscope is your Tonalli, or Day-Sign, the form bestowed upon you by the Sun.

Lizard: You are a true individual. You compromise only under extreme pressure, and then resent it if you have to. You often attract attention by being different, but this action often meets your "performance needs." More often, you are simply too involved in your own interests to even care what other people think about you.

Because you have a strong desire to appear before the public in some way, it is highly likely that you do work that is creative or performance oriented, and you are probably very competent, possibly outstanding, at what you do. Your standards are always high and you are probably an influential force in your world. You have natural leadership instincts and are not hesitant to take charge of situations when necessary. Others respect your competence and will follow your lead.

You do not tolerate superficiality. You take your interests very seriously, these often being "heavy" subjects like science, philosophy, religion and metaphysics. You are a powerful thinker and you are not easily swayed by argument. It is this mental determination that allows you to accomplish as much as you do. Down deep, you are very serious about your life.

In relationship matters, sexuality is a major issue for you. You are probably a highly sexed individual who needs to have an outlet for all that primal energy roaring within you. Many Lizard personalities channel this energy into work, music, ritual or other rhythmic and artistic projects. You may need to find a balance between overt sexual aggressiveness, which can lead to unstable and controversial relationship patterns, and sexual repression, which can cause just as much damage.

Like lizards, which perch on rocks or branches waiting for their meals to come to them, you may often appear on the surface to be lazy. But in reality, you are a passive stalker who works in full public view. You are quick to react to opportunities and make contacts with the right people and this allows you to move upward socially without offending many people.

Your Deeper Self -- The 13-Day Week of Your Birth
Each of us reacts to the world around us in different ways. Our reactions are mostly unconscious; they represent what our deeper self needs. Our reactions both attract and repel us from things, people, and situations. What we like, what we like to do, and who we really are is shown by the 13-day week called the Trecena that we were born under. Each of these periods begins with the number 1 and the name of the day-sign that starts it. A number is attached to your position within the 13-day period that may be an important number for you.

This is the tenth day of the 13-day period beginning with 1-Eagle. Beneath your surface personality you are a person with powerful faculties of discrimination. You really know the differences between things and also know how to express them. You may also be outstanding at articulating your feelings and emotions, or at least focusing them through a creative or artistic project. You are also probably somewhat pyschic and may find that your unconscious is your best friend, once you know how to listen to it. Freedom and independence is a major issue for you. You resist working for others and often become involved in self-employment that is creative or artistic. You are also probably quite fussy and tech-minded.

Try your sample Maya Aztec Reading

Pure Nerd 86 % Nerd, 17% Geek, 26% Dork For The Record: A Nerd is someone who is passionate about learning/being smart/academia. A Geek is someone who is passionate about some particular area or subject, often an obscure or difficult one. A Dork is someone who has difficulty with common social expectations/interactions. You scored better than half in Nerd, earning you the title of: Pure Nerd. The times, they are a-changing. It used to be that being exceptionally smart led to being unpopular, which would ultimately lead to picking up all of the traits and tendences associated with the "dork." No-longer. Being smart isn't as socially crippling as it once was, and even more so as you get older: eventually being a Pure Nerd will likely be replaced with the following label: Purely Successful. Congratulations! THE NERD? GEEK? OR DORK? TEST

The Liberated Lover 68% partner focus, 61% aggressiveness, 65% adventurousness

Based on the results of this test, it is highly likely that: You prefer your romance and love to wild and daring rather than typical or boring, you would rather pursue than be pursued and, when it comes to physical love, your satisfaction comes more from providing a wonderful time to your partner than simply seeking your own. This places you in the Lover Style of: The Liberated Lover. The Liberated Lover is a wonderful Lover Style, and forms the kind of free-thinking, sexually-exciting, self-confident lover that society once condemned but that a liberal-mind cherishes and exults. The Liberated Lover is a treasure to find, though it can sometimes be difficult to do so because they are often already engaged in relationships or are in high-demand if "in the market." In terms of physical love, the Liberated Lover is possibly the most thrilling and demanding of all, with the one potential drawback being that it is possible to feel 'overmatched' at times by their prowess and selfless giving. Given trust and understanding, and the right lover, the Liberated Lover can be a delight in bed. Best Compatibility can probably be found with: The Exotic Lover (most of all) or the Carnal Lover, or the Suave Lover. THE LOVER STYLE PROFILE TEST

The Quick & Painless ENNEAGRAM Test

the Asserter Thanks for taking the test !

you chose AY - your Enneagram type is EIGHT (aka "The Challenger"). "I must be strong" Asserters are direct, self-reliant, self-confident, and protective. How to Get Along with Me Stand up for yourself... and me. Be confident, strong, and direct. Don't gossip about me or betray my trust. Be vulnerable and share your feelings. See and acknowledge my tender, vulnerable side. Give me space to be alone. Acknowledge the contributions I make, but don't flatter me. I often speak in an assertive way. Don't automatically assume it's a personal attack. When I scream, curse, and stomp around, try to remember that's just the way I am. What I Like About Being a Eight being independent and self-reliant being able to take charge and meet challenges head on being courageous, straightforward, and honest getting all the enjoyment I can out of life supporting, empowering, and protecting those close to me upholding just causes What's Hard About Being a Eight overwhelming people with my bluntness; scaring them away when I don't intend to being restless and impatient with others' incompetence sticking my neck out for people and receiving no appreciation for it never forgetting injuries or injustices putting too much pressure on myself getting high blood pressure when people don't obey the rules or when things don't go right Eights as Children Often are independent; have an inner strength and a fighting spirit are sometimes loners seize control so they won't be controlled fugure out others' weaknesses attack verbally or physically when provoked take charge in the family because they perceive themselves as the strongest, or grow up in difficult or abusive surroundings Eights as Parents are often loyal, caring, involved, and devoted are sometimes overprotective can be demanding, controlling, and rigid Renee Baron & Elizabeth Wagele The Enneagram Made Easy Discover the 9 Types of People Harper SanFrancisco, 1994, 161 pages You liked the test? so please don't forget to RATE it... but remember! it had only two questions!!! ;-) you wanna know MORE? so check out, what Google found about your type... Take The Quick & Painless ENNEAGRAM Test

Confessions from my mind

Okay, I have come to a point now in my life where I have to admit that I think too much. I know I thought alot about why I think too much or how can I think less so that I don't have to think too much. I thought about how much thinking do I really need to do in my life.

Ugh, yes I admit. I have a problem thinking too much. I think over the years I am getting better at it by being more of a doer and feeler rather then just a thinker. I'm not so much in my head. I know I am stubborn. I hate how it makes my life unneccessarily difficult.

Yes I am getting better at being more superficial.

When people ask how you're doing, you don't need to give them the truth of how you are feeling. You just answer fine. It's just a way to exchange social pleasantriness.

I have been lusting for another guy at work these past few weeks and again I have realized I am thinking too much about the situation. I one day said hello. It seemed so easy. The fear in my mind has been dissolving. My perception of things change when I start to deal with my emotional state. What is reality?

This guy I usually would see at my lunch which I would take at around 12.45 but now he has lunch at a different time from noon to 12.30. I have been planning how I can run into him at lunch and the only way I'd be able to do it was if I caught him 2 minutes before he finishes. I thought that I didn't really need to have lunch the entire time he was, I just need a minute or two to say hello and perhaps ask how his day was going. He started his shift 2 hours earlier then I did as I start at 10 am and so eating at noon would be too early. But I also couldn't do this everyday otherwise he might think it was weird. I would think how he would think about what a coincedence that now I am eating at the same time he does. I was trying to think about the situation from his perspective. I would think how he would probably think I was creepy if I were doing that so I'd have to execute my plan a maximum of 2 days of the week.

Then on Friday he was on my floor, no longer on the upstairs floor. Does he notice me? I am looking at him as he walks by but I don't think he notices me. I kinda thought he likes me but then maybe now I don't. Is he aware of where my desk is? Does he notice the stuff on my desk. You know you can gather information about people by observing what's on their desk.

So I think too much about this guy and how can I tell if he likes me. I wrestle with myself. Why am I thinkig this. Does he even think half of what you think? Ask him out. Too bold for you? Talk to him. Converse with him. These things aren't too hard.

I am thinking too much.

I can stop.

And I did. I just said that's enough mind. I know it's difficult to ask out someone from work. Let's not overanalyze the situation.

There have been times in my life that I wish I was dumber. Having an analytical mind such as the one I possess is a mighty force to possess and it takes great skill and patience to tame this beast. It can be my best friend or my worst enemy. It will create inaccurate perceptions skewing my sense of reality or it will give me the most pristine and brilliant thoughts.

My mind will lead me either to my great demise or to great success.
It will either push me to ask questions that have not been asked and send me to new conceptual realms or it will send me to this dark abyss where I keep cycling the same thoughts over and over.

I am not alone. This is something many humans go through.

Merry Christmas

Belated Merry Christmas everyone!

Did nothing terribly exciting for Christmas. I personally do not celebrate Christmas as it is a religious holiday that celebrates the birth of Jesus. Y'all remember Jesus don't you? He's the whole reason why malls were invented and why we desperately need to spend our money on our loved ones and surprise them with gifts they may or may not like. It's all to atone for our sins. Shopping frantically the week before or even shopping a month in advance is what will make Baby Jesus happy.

I wonder what were Jesus' first words?
Virgin mama?
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I was watching Oprah's Christmas special for about 15 minutes. It showed what she and her staff did last year for Christmas. They gave children from various regions of South Africa gifts. They gave them a back pack with school supplies, black dolls for the girls, balls for the boys and runners. I thought it was nice but I kept thinking where were the gifts made from? Underpaid children in China?

I should hope not. It seems a bit foolish to want to help make people feel special by getting them stuff that comes from people who do not receive a living wage.

Kudos anyways.
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I get an extra day off work tomorrow which is nice. I like not working. I did some Steiner reading and have almost finished his book entitled Colour. I got a few weeks ago several martial arts dvd, one being a qigong dvd, the other a kung fu and the other is called water boxing or Liu He Ba Fa, which is an internal martial art. I began practising the water boxing form the other day. It's 9 minutes but it more complicated to learn then the qigong dvds I have because you are moving in more directions. I always find myself a bit overwhelmed when learning these things but I always have to remind myself to break down the task into smaller pieces.

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I decided to go to the mall today to check out what it is like. I normally don't go shopping at boxing day. The mall I went to was crazy busy. I went with my mother and we might have been there for 2 hours. All the stores we went that had clothes my mom liked didn't have much people whereas the ones I liked had an abudance of teenagers. We went out of this one store and there was just a row of men who were standing outside waiting for their women to be done.

Shopping isn't really fun for me. Over the past few years going to the mall or looking for things to buy was pure drugery. I spend more time looking at things that I do not care for. I'd rather just go in, buy what I need and get out.

The only good thing I got out of going to the mall was realizing that I have the things I need and that there was nothing there I particularly cared for.

But I really would have liked to find a matching baby blue hat and scarf set.
And a sweater.

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I have already made out my goals for 2007. I have 3 major ones and one of them is to move out. I can move out now and rent but I am interested in owning a condo. I have my budget all set up and have been pre-approved for a mortgage over a month ago. I have my 5% down payment. I am looking to move out to Burlington or Mississauga as I hate Hamilton. I'm just not feeling this city anymore. I think it sucks and there are many low lifes in the core.

I have no idea what to expect for next year but damn it I'm going to make my goals happen. It's time I grow up and make my mark and give the universe one good cosmic bitch slap and declare my material desires and ambitions.

I am in LOVE!

Greetings and Salutations Children of a drunken g-d,

I am in love. My parents bought a canary and he is flaming orange. I get to name him. He has a name but it's not clear to me yet what it is. I know a name will come to me soon. We used to own canaries. We had 2 males (at different times) years ago and they were both yellow. This one is so cute. I looked at him today and he was actually acting shy around me. He would turn his head slightly down and to the side.

Adorable, adorable, adorable.

I just want to open the cage, grab him and squeeze him and kiss him. He is just so cute!

My dad is retired and so thought getting canaries would be a good hobby for him. He wanted to get a female but was told that if you get the female with the male, the male won't sing. So my parents decided to go the selfish route and decided to just get the male so that it would sing.

When we had our second canary, we ended up getting a female months later. They are supposed to be gradually introduced i.e. not to share the same cage right away. We did that and the female (Rosie) laid eggs. The male (Bobby) destroyed them and Rosie began attacking and fighting with Bobby and we had to separate them.

I think it is quite sad that the male will only sing when alone. These animals get to be creative but only in solitude. Their only companions are the human hands that feed them. They experience loneliness for our enjoyment.

Oh the plight of the lone canary.

The pet store also has a 30 day policy. If he doesn't sing, we have 30 days to return. He has done some chirping but nothing spectacular. Our previous canaries weren't shy and were singing right away.

Here is a picture of my new love.

My seduction style

Sick greetings

Word up my peeps,

Today I woke up sick. I thought I was just getting lazy because I did nothing yesterday but it turned out my throat is not doing well. I'm feeling a bit better now. I'm strong enough to hurl insults but not for a sustained period.

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I've given up on my crush at work. I never see him. So now I have no one to lust for in my life. It makes for a meaningless existence when you can't go beyond your own little world. I can only self-lust and proclaim my hottness and desirability for so long. I'm bored with thinking about myself and I'm too lazy to be more altruistic. I want to direct my lust to someone else. It's not fair!

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I got one of the most depressing Christmas e-greeting from someone who used to be in my Steiner book group. She's moved back to Germany and sent an e-update about her life. She was preggo when she left Canada and she sent pictures after her son was born. In this e-update she talked about how she got sick a lot only to discover that she had mono. She went on how she misses Canada. I like the woman. I didn't know her well but she seemed like a chipper woman.

Maybe she doesn't realize that you can bullshit when you send these updates. Or at least put a positive spin on the negative like any reliable news source would.

Banana Nanna

Greetings and Salutations Children of a Non-Existent G-d,

Normally I will have a banana at lunch when I am at work. I don't eat bananas on the weekend, usually just at work. I also use a knife to cut open my banana as many times there are parts of the banana that are a bit mushy so the knife comes in handy. It's become a habit for me to analyze and dissect my banana. I won't even eat that stringy peel part that's on the banana. I don't know what the correct term but the consensus at work (yes I've had to ask a few people if they know what the correct term is. Clearly none of us are banana experts.) is that they are the fibers of the banana.

I won't even eat the fibers of the banana and will pick away at it. I like to use the knife to lift it up just enough so that I can pull it off with my fingers.

I've had someone comment to me last year when I was at work (not where I am currently working but some other company) enjoying my lunch about how I eat my banana. I guess they never saw anyone use a knife. They weren't being rude or anything but that day I lost my innocence about using my knife. I didn't think using a knife to open a banana was such a big deal. That day was the day I realized that most people don't use knives.

That day I realized that the way I ate my banana was different from how everyone else ate their bananas.

Last month at work I was eating my banana. There were 2 new guys in the lunch room. I was using my knife to cut open my banana and had to cut off the mushy parts. As I was eating, I noticed one of the guys was looking at me. I looked at him. Neither of us said a word. At first I thought he was looking at me because I'm hot but then I began thinking how he probably thought it was weird that I used a knife on my banana.

So today I thought I'd break out of my comfort zone with always using a knife. I went without one. It felt awkward. I felt like I had slid down the evolutionary chain. I no longer was superior to animals. I became one of them. I had to struggle to rip open the banana. There was a brown spot on the banana and all I could do was pick at it with my finger. The tip of the banana was mushy.

I lost my humanity today but tomorrow I will gain it back.
Tomorrow I will use a knife.

Gettin' Older

Greeting and Salutations Humanized hemoglobinites,

I went shopping with my mother this weekend for a new coat as that will be my present for Christmas from them. On the way to the store, my mother asked me when I was going to get married. She has not asked me this question before. I will be 28 next January and so I guess this is one of the markers that I am getting old. I also don't have a boyfriend. She thinks I should get married by 30. She believes that if I don't get married when I am young, it will be difficult for me to get along with someone.

I don't really like the term marriage. I have many negative associations with that word. Associations such as slavery, lack of freedom, being controlled, conforming to society and losing your individuality.
I do however want someone with whom I can spend many many years with. Someone who is funny and intelligent and understands my weirdness. I have many things in my life to entertain me and I'm not going to stress like many other single ladies about how they 'need to get married'.

I think my mother also expects me to get married in a church but I certainly would not do that. I do not like organized religion and certainly want to have as minimal contact with religion as possible.

* * *
I seem to have this addiction to gum. I will eat several gums throughout the day at work. I'm also a swallower of gum. So I might have a bunch of gum in the span of 10 minutes. I remember watching some tv show when I was kid that debunked the myth that gum stays in your body for 7 years. So ever since that time, I freely would swallow my gum because I knew that it would get digested.

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I had an interesting conversation with some people last week about sex. These people are in relationships and have gone several weeks without getting some. I have a friend who helps me. So I get it regularly. I'll get it 3-4 times a month. On average I'll get it every week or once every 10 days. Now I am not here to judge these people's sexual activity. I am bringing this up because every once in a while there will be in the news the average number of times people have sex in a week. I've heard the national average being 2-3 times a week. So here I am thinking I am below the national average. How accurate are these stats? I am sure that many people lie about their sex lives.

Who is having all this sex?