Greetings and Salutations,
I have previously mentioned in my posts probably last year around this time how I feel conflicted about Christmas and gift giving.
Well this year I bought some gifts for my immediate family. I really derive little joy or pleasure in getting people gifts. I as well don't really get much out of receiving gifts as well.
I read this book a long time ago entitled "The 5 Love Languages" by Gary Chapman and I believe this books probably explains why I despise this time of year and the social obligation to buy gifts. According to this book there are five ways people show love and they are through spending quality time with someone,words of affirmation, gifts, acts of service, and physical touch. The basic premise of the book is that people largely feel unloved in relationships (whether they are familial, friendships or your companion) because people do not know what their love language is. We also tend to show love to others the way we would like to receive. For example, if we like getting hugs we will show our love to others by giving them hugs even though for the recipient, receiving physical contact is not their primary love language.
So maybe this is why I find buying things so meaningless. I am not someone that feels loved when I get gifts. I associate so many negative things when buying people stuff. First off, I like buying things that someone will enjoy. I am a highly practical person and since I don't like having things I will not use, I do not like getting things for people that they can't use. It would cause me great pain to buy something for someone they will not use that enhances their life in some way. This is also why I am not a knick-knack person. What do you do with a knick-knack? Nothing. They are just things to clean up. In other words, a knick knack is work and I loathe unnecessary work.
There is the stress of having to think of stuff to buy them that they will actually enjoy. I don't even like shopping for myself because it really bothers me to be in stores and to realize how much stuff of it is just useless and a waste of people's time and effort to make these various products. And then I feel bad for the people selling this crap in the store because they have to get rid of the shit.
Our whole economy seems largely driven to make crap and to force people to take crappy jobs so that they can buy this crap. And then they have people that are trained to market this crap, convincing us how we must have this crap to have a good life. And then once people have had this crap for long enough, they throw it out and then we have a whole other industry that deals with how to get rid of the crap we created just for the sake of creating crap.
Crap!
Anyways, for me I like spending quality time with people and hearing words of affirmation. Nothing makes me feel better then knowing someone is listening to what I have to say and respects and pays attention to me. And that they are there for me when I need help.
That's really all I want for Christmas.
Listen and respect me.
