Greetings all,
I had been notified this morning at work that I was getting laid off. I was and still am quite surprised. My contract expires at the end of September. I know they can let me go whenever but I didn't think I'd be let go since there were others who are newer then me. I didn't get a clear reason for why I was let go but someone was telling me they were having some budget issue and maybe needed to let people go.
I had booked tomorrow off because I am going to Georgia for a kundalini yoga retreat. I really don't want to have to go back to finding a job. I know how hard that is and I don't even know if I want to go back to school.
I hope things work out for me. This year was looking good but then this happens...
Oh well!
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Sunday, July 18, 2010
Friends
Greetings all,
The previous post had gotten me riled up a bit but it brings me back to a concept that if you want to have friends, then you have be a good friend. If you are being hurtful to someone, instead of further picking on them when they begin to challenge your behaviour, why not look at your own behaviour instead of being accusatory of the other? Maybe your the one with the problem.
The thing is with people like that is they get upset that no one likes them or no one listens to them. Rather then learning to modify their behaviour, they continue to blame everyone else around.
No one want to be treated in a hostile manner and eventually no one will tolerate hostile, mean and angry, bitchy people.
The fact that I won't tolerate assholes in my life is not about me having control issues but about me having a healthy level of self respect.
Some people have no power and are jealous of those people like me who choose to deal with their issues instead of letting the anger and resentment build up within them.
Some people are just inadequate and insecure and all they know how to do is be miserable and try to take people down to their level. I'm not going down that road as I choose to be happy and free and responsible and emotionally mature.
The previous post had gotten me riled up a bit but it brings me back to a concept that if you want to have friends, then you have be a good friend. If you are being hurtful to someone, instead of further picking on them when they begin to challenge your behaviour, why not look at your own behaviour instead of being accusatory of the other? Maybe your the one with the problem.
The thing is with people like that is they get upset that no one likes them or no one listens to them. Rather then learning to modify their behaviour, they continue to blame everyone else around.
No one want to be treated in a hostile manner and eventually no one will tolerate hostile, mean and angry, bitchy people.
The fact that I won't tolerate assholes in my life is not about me having control issues but about me having a healthy level of self respect.
Some people have no power and are jealous of those people like me who choose to deal with their issues instead of letting the anger and resentment build up within them.
Some people are just inadequate and insecure and all they know how to do is be miserable and try to take people down to their level. I'm not going down that road as I choose to be happy and free and responsible and emotionally mature.
Unfriending on Facebook
Greetings all,
I've had to unfriend an improv 'friend' on my facebook mainly because I had felt this person has been too rude on my status updates. I initially had blocked him from commenting on my status. A few days ago I had commented on his status. I am not hostile like he is and am socially appropriate. He had childishly brought up how I blocked him. I ended up messaging him and got some long winded response, basically not acknowledging and taking responsibility for his hostile actions and words. Had said I have censorship issues and doesn't understand why his humour offends me.
Half the time, the jokes and comments are just down right mean and cruel. You can't just say to people that you don't get their humour if you are behaving like an asshole half the time. It's not funny and it's being mean. It's not something to be proud of. It's down right sad.
I eventually responded. I don't know why because frankly I am someone that usually gives a little fight when being faced by this type of ignorant behaviour. I had said my boundaries were disrespected more then once and that he probably could be more sensitive.
Basically he is a hostile and angry person with emotional issues and basically hasn't dealt with them and so views the world and people from this self righteous and angry perspective. Has quite the chip on his shoulder. Whereas I am responsible about my emotions and anger and use yoga as a tool to help me process my hurt.
I'm not about to have that type of person in my life. I hardly see him in real life and certainly will not tolerate this online.
His response to my comment was:
Meh.
As a result, I unfriended him. It clearly shows his emotional maturity level is low and he is being dismissive. Friends have conflicts but I believe most normal humans can talk out their difficulties. Some people just don't want to and dig their heels further into their position and further believe that they are right.
I'm not responsible for the hurt people feel. They are responsible for their emotional health. I will not feel bad because someone can't manage their anger. That is not my responsibility.
I've had to unfriend an improv 'friend' on my facebook mainly because I had felt this person has been too rude on my status updates. I initially had blocked him from commenting on my status. A few days ago I had commented on his status. I am not hostile like he is and am socially appropriate. He had childishly brought up how I blocked him. I ended up messaging him and got some long winded response, basically not acknowledging and taking responsibility for his hostile actions and words. Had said I have censorship issues and doesn't understand why his humour offends me.
Half the time, the jokes and comments are just down right mean and cruel. You can't just say to people that you don't get their humour if you are behaving like an asshole half the time. It's not funny and it's being mean. It's not something to be proud of. It's down right sad.
I eventually responded. I don't know why because frankly I am someone that usually gives a little fight when being faced by this type of ignorant behaviour. I had said my boundaries were disrespected more then once and that he probably could be more sensitive.
Basically he is a hostile and angry person with emotional issues and basically hasn't dealt with them and so views the world and people from this self righteous and angry perspective. Has quite the chip on his shoulder. Whereas I am responsible about my emotions and anger and use yoga as a tool to help me process my hurt.
I'm not about to have that type of person in my life. I hardly see him in real life and certainly will not tolerate this online.
His response to my comment was:
Meh.
As a result, I unfriended him. It clearly shows his emotional maturity level is low and he is being dismissive. Friends have conflicts but I believe most normal humans can talk out their difficulties. Some people just don't want to and dig their heels further into their position and further believe that they are right.
I'm not responsible for the hurt people feel. They are responsible for their emotional health. I will not feel bad because someone can't manage their anger. That is not my responsibility.
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Oh God!
Greetings all,
I just don't think I can believe there is a god. I'm not an atheist however and am more agnostic and skeptical that one exists.
I'm tired of hearing people talk about the will of God. Why does what happens that is beyond our comprehension have to be identified as the will of God? Why can't we just acknowledge the limits of what we know and not attach to god.
Is there a higher power? Who knows!
We humans, obviously need humility and the ability to surrender. Why surrender to a higher power or a god? Why not just surrender for the sake of surrendering and not to some higher power?
I just don't think I can believe there is a god. I'm not an atheist however and am more agnostic and skeptical that one exists.
I'm tired of hearing people talk about the will of God. Why does what happens that is beyond our comprehension have to be identified as the will of God? Why can't we just acknowledge the limits of what we know and not attach to god.
Is there a higher power? Who knows!
We humans, obviously need humility and the ability to surrender. Why surrender to a higher power or a god? Why not just surrender for the sake of surrendering and not to some higher power?
Monday, July 12, 2010
Online Dating Continues
Greetings all,
I've been on a dating site now for almost 2 months and have gone on 2 dates. The thing I don't like is that being that I am 31, I am looking for a man who is close to my age, ideally under 35. I'm being generous and have opened the window to men under 40 and sometimes will respond to someone who is 41. I am open to someone younger, although men tend to mature slower then a woman and so I'm open to someone as young as 26, although I would prefer no younger then 27 or 28.
Now as a woman, I think women have to be picky for biological reasons. We are the ones that carry the baby and so logically it would make sense for a woman to be picky.
I've seen one man post on his profile that he wants a woman with brown hair. I was offended by this and ranted to my coworkers at lunch because I don't select a man based on his hair. True, I may prefer blondes but I am open to hair colours. And it's a very superficial thing to be fussy about. I can understand things like wanting children and smoking. But a man in my eyes, has ZERO rights to be so fussy like that.
The other thing that is annoying is that I am having men who are well over my age range hit on me. I think I had someone who was 50 wink at me. That is way too old for me. If I already did the marriage and kids thing already, maybe I wouldn't be so discriminatory but since I want kids and a husband in the long run, a man that age is just out of the question.
Don't get me wrong, anyone can be attractive but I can't build my life with someone that age. I just don't understand why they even bother trying! I know some women in their 50s get frustrated that men their age are hitting on younger women, but being that I am a younger woman by comparison, I really don't appreciate it and I think they are wasting their time!
I've mentioned this before but men just need to be more realistic and realize that they are not the ones with the power when it comes to mate selection.
I've been on a dating site now for almost 2 months and have gone on 2 dates. The thing I don't like is that being that I am 31, I am looking for a man who is close to my age, ideally under 35. I'm being generous and have opened the window to men under 40 and sometimes will respond to someone who is 41. I am open to someone younger, although men tend to mature slower then a woman and so I'm open to someone as young as 26, although I would prefer no younger then 27 or 28.
Now as a woman, I think women have to be picky for biological reasons. We are the ones that carry the baby and so logically it would make sense for a woman to be picky.
I've seen one man post on his profile that he wants a woman with brown hair. I was offended by this and ranted to my coworkers at lunch because I don't select a man based on his hair. True, I may prefer blondes but I am open to hair colours. And it's a very superficial thing to be fussy about. I can understand things like wanting children and smoking. But a man in my eyes, has ZERO rights to be so fussy like that.
The other thing that is annoying is that I am having men who are well over my age range hit on me. I think I had someone who was 50 wink at me. That is way too old for me. If I already did the marriage and kids thing already, maybe I wouldn't be so discriminatory but since I want kids and a husband in the long run, a man that age is just out of the question.
Don't get me wrong, anyone can be attractive but I can't build my life with someone that age. I just don't understand why they even bother trying! I know some women in their 50s get frustrated that men their age are hitting on younger women, but being that I am a younger woman by comparison, I really don't appreciate it and I think they are wasting their time!
I've mentioned this before but men just need to be more realistic and realize that they are not the ones with the power when it comes to mate selection.
Sunday, July 04, 2010
Free Hugs!
Greetings all,
One of the improv missions we did yesterday was the Free Hugs mission. They have been doing this annually for several years and I decided to participate in this. Basically it involves having a sign saying 'Free Hugs' and you randomly hug complete strangers that you meet on the street.
I had made my sign on Saturday morning and was in a bit of a rush as the night before I went out and was dancing the night away so I didn't get to sleep until 3 am. I had to be at the meeting place for 3 so I didn't have too much time to doddle as I like to take things slow on my days off. I had decided to use a coloured bristol board and then use blank paper to cut out the letters. I just cut them directly from the paper, not outlining them. I was improvising! For some reason, I had a hard time making the letter G. I don't know why but my brain couldn't figure out how to do it and I had to write out on some scrap piece of paper how to do the G and I had to think about how it needed to be cut.
I am not the hugging type actually. I have read in a book a while ago, called The 5 Love Languages about the different ways people show love and hugging (touch) was one of them. I am more into verbal affirmations. The others were spending time with them, doing things for them (acts of service) and giving gifts.
This was actually a bit of an awkward experience for me but I like the concept. The concept of having a sign and giving random strangers hugs. I was definitely out of my comfort zone yesterday! We broke up into smaller groups and we made our way to the Yonge and Dundas Square. Our group was fragmented at times and I think we should have worked together more as a team to be effective.
Three guys were topless and had on their chests Free Hugs. Most of the people that come out to these missions tend to be in high school. These topless guys didn't get too many willing people to hug them and it's probably because no one wants to hug topless males, although some people were willing to be photographed with them, probably because they found it humourous. One of them had boxer-brief shorts so he just looked like an ass. And I think one woman that saw him just had a shocked look on her face. Most people don't want a hug from someone where their junk is just a little too visible.
A couple of the girls were more outgoing and so they were more successful in getting hugs. I think that's the key thing. It's like selling and you have to be a bit more outgoing and encouraging to the passerbys. Being that I hate selling, I wasn't really being that aggressive in getting hugs. I basically held my sign and would hope someone was open to hugging or I would be by the go-getters and get second hand hugs.
Obviously, you have to respect people's boundaries so if someone didn't want a hug, you don't push for it. There were many polite declines but there were people who were happy to get a hug. I certainly think being more encouraging helps.
I had wanted to do it last year and but didn't because I had other plans. I was a bit scared about hugging creepy people and perverts but hugging someone only takes a few seconds and everyone needs love in this world, even the creepy ones!
I had participated in the hugging for an hour as I had plans for a barbecue that night. I think the group probably was doing it for 1.5 to 2 hours, which I think is a bit long. I think the enthusiasm wanes a bit by the time you do it for an hour.
I think if I were to do it again, I'd probably feel more comfortable but it was a good experience, although a bit frightening at times.
One of the improv missions we did yesterday was the Free Hugs mission. They have been doing this annually for several years and I decided to participate in this. Basically it involves having a sign saying 'Free Hugs' and you randomly hug complete strangers that you meet on the street.
I had made my sign on Saturday morning and was in a bit of a rush as the night before I went out and was dancing the night away so I didn't get to sleep until 3 am. I had to be at the meeting place for 3 so I didn't have too much time to doddle as I like to take things slow on my days off. I had decided to use a coloured bristol board and then use blank paper to cut out the letters. I just cut them directly from the paper, not outlining them. I was improvising! For some reason, I had a hard time making the letter G. I don't know why but my brain couldn't figure out how to do it and I had to write out on some scrap piece of paper how to do the G and I had to think about how it needed to be cut.
I am not the hugging type actually. I have read in a book a while ago, called The 5 Love Languages about the different ways people show love and hugging (touch) was one of them. I am more into verbal affirmations. The others were spending time with them, doing things for them (acts of service) and giving gifts.
This was actually a bit of an awkward experience for me but I like the concept. The concept of having a sign and giving random strangers hugs. I was definitely out of my comfort zone yesterday! We broke up into smaller groups and we made our way to the Yonge and Dundas Square. Our group was fragmented at times and I think we should have worked together more as a team to be effective.
Three guys were topless and had on their chests Free Hugs. Most of the people that come out to these missions tend to be in high school. These topless guys didn't get too many willing people to hug them and it's probably because no one wants to hug topless males, although some people were willing to be photographed with them, probably because they found it humourous. One of them had boxer-brief shorts so he just looked like an ass. And I think one woman that saw him just had a shocked look on her face. Most people don't want a hug from someone where their junk is just a little too visible.
A couple of the girls were more outgoing and so they were more successful in getting hugs. I think that's the key thing. It's like selling and you have to be a bit more outgoing and encouraging to the passerbys. Being that I hate selling, I wasn't really being that aggressive in getting hugs. I basically held my sign and would hope someone was open to hugging or I would be by the go-getters and get second hand hugs.
Obviously, you have to respect people's boundaries so if someone didn't want a hug, you don't push for it. There were many polite declines but there were people who were happy to get a hug. I certainly think being more encouraging helps.
I had wanted to do it last year and but didn't because I had other plans. I was a bit scared about hugging creepy people and perverts but hugging someone only takes a few seconds and everyone needs love in this world, even the creepy ones!
I had participated in the hugging for an hour as I had plans for a barbecue that night. I think the group probably was doing it for 1.5 to 2 hours, which I think is a bit long. I think the enthusiasm wanes a bit by the time you do it for an hour.
I think if I were to do it again, I'd probably feel more comfortable but it was a good experience, although a bit frightening at times.
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