Wednesday, September 16, 2015

The Big Bang Theory

Greetings all,

I don't have cable since I stopped watching tv years ago and once I moved out of my parents, I saw no point in paying $40+ for something I rarely use. When I would visit my parents, I would on occasion an episode. I decided once I finished my summer courses this year, that I would binge watch this series. I found out that only the Hamilton public library has the series and not the Toronto library so I had to watch them while at my parents. It was a lot of work.

I think it didn't start out that good because the Howard character was way too weird and creepy. He didn't start becoming 'normal' until he was in a relationship, which is sad in a way that television promotes the idea that only a woman 'cures' a creepy, sex deprived man.

My favourite character is of course Sheldon. He is the character I relate to the most as he has these social quirks and doesn't understand various social customs. I was like this when I was younger and had to learn these social customs that to me, didn't make much sense. Like when you ask someone how are they. You don't really want to know how they are doing. You are just supposed to give them a polite response like 'good' or 'great'. He is also very honest and doesn't hide his thoughts, which is pretty much how I am like.

Sheldon is also precise in how he likes things and particular about where he sits and is possessive of where he sits. I am the same way and like to sit in certain spots.

I caught up to season 7 and right now the library is ordering season 8 which I am on the waitlist for. I told my brother to tape season 9.

The only way I don't relate to Sheldon is his dislike of being in a relationship and the physical aspect. I don't know if he ends up having sex in season 8 but I sure hope to see him have sex in season 9. I don't understand how someone could wait 3 years before being comfortable with kissing and it's not even deep french kissing. I guess because I am a lover that I just don't understand the lack of affection. I also learned in real life the guy who plays Sheldon, Jim Parsons is gay and 42. He looks so young with his baby face.

It took me a while to see it but I am finding the Raj character attractive. I like his smile as it's nice and big but sadly he too is married in real life so no chance for me!

Sunday, August 16, 2015

The Real University of Toronto Lingo

Greetings all,

I'm subscribed to various pages for my university and recently they posted the Lingo that First Year students need to know. It was pretty lame so I decided to come up with the REAL lingo that students need to know when they first come to UofT

http://www.studentlife.utoronto.ca/hello/glossary
A is for Alone which is how you will feel in the classes with over 300 students
B is for Bell Curve which is what a lot of profs use to compensate for their ridiculously hard tests
C is for Crying, which is something you'll engage more in once you start at UofT
D is for Despair, which is how you feel when you realize that that 4.0 GPA is out of your reach
E is for Expensive because an education costs a lot nowadays
F is for F*cked, which is how you will feel on a daily basis
G is for God Damn, which are words you will be utilizing more during your time at UofT
H is for Hell, which is how UofT feels
I is for Isolated, which is how you will feel from the world since you will spend all of your time studying
J is for Joy, that feeling that will get sucked out of you during midterms
K is for the Knowledge you will lose two days after you finish an exam
L is for Life, which you will not have because all your time is spent on doing school work
M is for Moron, which is how you will feel on a daily basis because what you know is so small compared to what you do know
N is for Nausea, the sensation you will experience when waiting to write your tests and exams
O is for Oblivious which is how most professors are on how difficult and painful their tests are for other students
P is for Pain, which is what you will experience
Q is for Queasy, which is how you feel when you have prepared extensively for a test but the professor has not given the class any sort of material to prepare for it
R is for Ridiculous which is what you will think about tests as you'll realize professors will put questions tests that they absolutely gave you no skills on how to solve during class
S is for Sanity, that thing you will inevitably lose after midterms
T is for Tears, a lot of which will be shed when you realize that you probably will no do as well as you would like in your courses.
U is for University. You will be using this word daily such as "Why did I choose this University when I could have chosen a more easier one?"
V is for Vindictive, which is what the profs are
W is for Weak which is how you will feel as the time and effort you put in at UofT will make you feel this way all the time
X is for Xeric what will happen to your brain from all the studying it has been engaging in
Y is for Yawn as some professors have no passion and will bore you to tears with their lectures that sometimes teaches you nothing of value
Z is for Zest for Life, which you lose during your time at UofT

Saturday, August 01, 2015

The End of a Haira

Greetings all,

I recently buzzed my hair. I stopped colouring it funky colours like green, neon red, purple, blue and pink. I had been using the funky colours for about 1.5 years and prior to that, simply bleaching my hair to look like a blonde for 1 year. So in total my hair has been bleached for 2.5 years and I think in spite of my giving myself oil treatments the past few months, my hair quality has slightly decreased. I also felt I have done all the colours I wanted to (except rainbow) and was ready to take a break from dyeing my hair because it was effort but also it had annoying consequences like sometimes rubbing off on my clothes within the first week of being dyed. My neon red for example was really bad for this and I had to sleep with a towel so that the colour wouldn't rub off on my pillow case.

Now I only have 1/2 an inch of hair. My hair feels prickly and I feel rather naked and self conscious. I only had 2 options. Get a buzz or redye my hair to my natural colour. I felt the later was a form of cheating but also due to my hair quality decreasing, I felt I wanted to start fresh. Bleaching my hair had made my hair feel a bit straw like.

I don't regret my decision because it was a decision made out of practicality but I certainly don't like the consequences. I don't feel right. Having hair can be annoying and sometimes I felt like my hair was weighing me down but now that I have very little hair, I realize it's not my hair that weighs me down, it's simply the burden of carrying a head on my neck that weighs me down.

I feel like I'm a super hero who's lost her powers. When I first dyed my hair pink, I felt like a super hero, it was great. I feel the world needs more colour and so I tend to dress more in colour instead of wearing exclusively black, which is how alot of people dress in the work world.

It makes me sad and am back to my boring brown hair.
Now I am just an ordinary civilian.

Sunday, June 07, 2015

New Musical Obsession

Hey y'all,

I've been listening to obsessively a new artist (for me at least) named Ludovico Einaudi. I heard the tail end of his song, Life when my mom and I were driving home from visiting the Cheltenham Badlands. It's a classical music song and I thought it was so amazing and I had to listen to it on Youtube. I started to listen to his other pieces and found so many other amazing songs. They have so much emotional depth and richness. I can't get enough of his work. I ordered some of his CDs last night so I am looking forward to being able to listen to more of his work. Here are some of his songs. My favourites so far are The Earth Prelude, Divenire, Life, Primavera and Nuovole Bianche to name a few. The Earth Prelude is a beautiful combination of melancholy and courage. Primavera is the kind of song I like to fold my laundry to. Fold it with gusto! Divenire has been used by Procter and Gamble for an Olympic commerical. It's a good song choice but I hope his music doesn't get chosen simply to be commercialized. It cheapens the music in a way but it can also make people more familiar with the artist.


Life

 

The Earth Prelude


Divenire


 

Primavera




Nuove Bianche


Thursday, February 19, 2015

Crushed

Greetings all,

I recently asked my crush for coffee since it was reading week and he told me he was seeing someone. This was on Valentine's day. I actually asked him a week before but never got around to checking my messages. He thought I meant if I wanted him to organize a social for the improv group but I responded eventually that I was asking him out. I was a bit disappointed and also embarrassed. It really reaffirms to me that if a guy likes you, he'll do the work. I guess now I feel like a loser but I have to act normal when I see him again at improv as we have a show next week.

Maybe he did like me but liked someone else better and pursued that since maybe the girl was more explicit in showing her interest in him. Oh well, just another reason why it sucks to be an introvert.

I guess I can't linger too much over this as there are plenty of fish in the sea.

Juice Fast

Greetings all,

I decided to try a juice fast, initially for 10 days. A couple of weeks ago I watched Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead and thought I'd give it a try. I tried the Master Cleanse once and I think I only lasted 2 days. Then I had intense cravings for junk food. Normally my cravings are mild and usually I crave more just before my period but I never had the desire for junk food so intensely as when I came off this cleanse.

My mom paid a juicer under $100. I completed Day 3 and have been hungry throughout this whole ordeal. I think I might just do a 5 day fast instead. I feel I should give it an honest go, unlike when I tried the Master Cleanse and quit early.

I've been having headaches all day on Day 1 and 2 and not so much today. Just sparingly experiencing headaches. My brain doesn't seem to work as well either. I feel out of it, slow and spacey.

I'm on the web site for Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead and so it seems like it helps people with weight loss but perhaps I'm not fat enough for it to make much of an impact. Actually I did see a thin girl try a 5 day juice fast to loss her holiday weight and she did lose 6 lbs and was more toned.

I'm looking forward to this being over but I want to see if I binge on junk food afterwards. At least with this juice fast, I am getting some nutrients because I'm drinking stuff like carrots, kale, romaine, cucumbers, apples and beets.The Master Cleanse probably had less nutritional benefits.

I've been eyeballing this bag of chips my mother has in my closet. It's reading week so I'm doing this fast at my parents. It seems like a lot of work too and probably expensive to do. My mom has been buying my ingredients and I feel like I use up a lot of vegetables just to make a cup! I feel bad in a way. It offends my sense of efficiency too because it takes a lot of food to make the juice.

I do need to lose weight and probably this is motivated by how difficult it is for me to lose weight. I could probably lose 30 lbs. I might have to work out more. I want to eat more vegetables so juicing seems like a good way to eat more vegetables. Maybe this will be something I do once a week.

Wednesday, January 28, 2015

Crushing

Greetings,

I've been involved with improv at school and have started to develop a crush on someone in the group. I've been crushing on him since November I think. I think he likes me too but I can't really tell. We did an improv warm up where we free associate with words and when I do improv, I am in improv mode. I am not in flirty mode and when I was in the circle to get words to associate, he gave me the word "cute" and I said "me". I didn't think much of it at the time but when I got home, I thought maybe he was flirting with me and I completely missed it. We did a show maybe a week or two prior to that and during warm ups, I felt like maybe he had a thing for me. I never really paid much attention to him but ever since that day where he threw out the word "cute", I started to develop a crush on him.

I'm not really flirty either at improv either and we don't have much time to talk to each other. I was planning to go out for my birthday recently to do a live escape game since it's free if it's your birthday. I invited him on Saturday and he didn't get back to me until the Tuesday, the day of my birthday. He said he couldn't make it and seemed apologetic as I messaged him on Facebook. I figure if he was interested, he would have said yes. Or if he was interested in going out with me but couldn't make it, would have suggested to go out another time.

So I'm kinda not sure about what to do. I've read some online dating advice and basically says you shouldn't obsess about whether or not a guy likes you. You should just assume he wants you and just be confident and be your normal, fun stuff.

I'm not sure if he's interested. He's a bit younger than me but I'm open to dating someone and to see where it goes. He seems like he's sweet and it would be nice to get to know him better. I'm not really flirty at improv and I don't even know how I could be because I get so focused on improv and I also tend to be more reserved in group situations.

A part of me thinks he's not interested because if he was, wouldn't he have asked me out for coffee or something by now?

Anyways, we'll see how it goes but I don't have much patience when it comes to these sorta things. If he wants me, he should just ask me out. That's the man's job!

I know with my last boyfriend, I had flirt with him a lot before he finally decided to ask me out. I just don't feel I have the same patience but also it's harder to flirt at improv and I don't want to be so obvious about it either.

Hair Experiment

Greetings all,

I recently read that you can use castor oil and peppermint oil on your scalp to improv your hair growth and to thicken it. I've had the problem of thinning hair for the past few years but also a certain area where my bangs are, are thinning out so much that I'm starting to look bald!

My dad has pointed it out to me before but I didn't know what to do so I would just live with it.
Now I researched that you can use castor oil and peppermint oil on your scalp so I started to do that. I've only applied it once and haven't noticed anything.

What I did notice that my hair doesn't feel oily. I wash my hair every 2nd day and last night I just took my shower and rinsed my hair with water because I felt like it wasn't oily and needing to be washed and it actually feels okay today. I tried before the No Poo method where you don't wash your hair and only use baking soda and apple cider vinegar on your hair to remove the oil. I didn't like that method and stopped doing it. So maybe giving your scalp regular oil treatments actually helps with reducing its oil production.

My hair is pretty oil actually and by day 2 looks oily so surprised by the lack of usual oiliness. Anyways, my goal with this oil and peppermint treatment is to thicken my hair and improv growth so it will take some time before I notice anything

Saturday, December 20, 2014

Working with Sopurkh Again

Greetings all,

I wrote a while ago that I was working with the mantra Sopurkh. I did write how I had some dreams but I didn't feel it was working. I decided to work with it again, although I can't remember when I stopped chanting it.As I previously wrote, I was hoping it would help my brother and my dad and also help me be in a meaningful relationship.

When I stopped, I didn't have these things manifested, although as I mentioned in that post, I did have some healing dreams about my ex. I actually think the shabad did work, although it didn't work right away. As mentioned, I wanted my dad to be more healthier, exercise and quit smoking. He started having issues with his one leg as he would have difficulty walking for more than 5 minutes at a time. It took a while to figure out what was wrong with him but eventually the doctor said it was because he smoked as it was restricting the blood flow in his leg. He was advised to quit smoking. This was back in November and my dad stopped smoking. It's been about 6 weeks.

I think when I was reflecting on this, this week, I realized maybe my chanting did have an effect, although a delayed effect. Lots of the women who chanted this would notice immediate changes so that's also why I was skeptical about the value of this. Maybe it's because the men in my family are very stubborn. I've been telling my dad to stop smoking ever since I was a child because he was a smoker since he was like 14. I was always worried that he would get cancer and die from it and my mother found a note I typed on a typewriter as a child, advising him to stop smoking so that he wouldn't die.

The other person I was chanting for was my brother. He seems to be getting worse and is even more nervous. He was diagnosed with ADHD but I'm not sure I believe in that. He was on different medication a few months ago but it just made him worse. He's still living with my parents and is still jobless for 3 years. He's a constant pain in the ass when I visit my family and is constantly verbally abusing me. My father and him don't get along and I hope the chanting helps my brother out because he's so messed up and really needs to grow up and get his life together.

I still am chanting for myself because I want to be with my soulmate, the man whom I can spend my life with, have a family and grow old with.

I had 3 objectives and 1 of them has been achieved. Maybe if I continue with it some more, I can attain my other objectives. I guess it may not manifest right away but I do hope things get better