Miscellaneous Stuff

Greetings and Salutations,

I bought some plants for my place. There are a few more that I will buy. I want to put a couple more in my kitchen and probably 1 or 2 in my bedroom. I read that at night plants take in oxygen and release carbon dioxide but in order for it to be bad for humans, there has to be pounds and pounds of plants for it to be equivalent to how much oxygen a human consumes. Some Feng Shui sites suggest not to have plants in your bedroom but I'm not really into feng shui.

I think I will put a plant or two in my bedroom. It can't be that bad.

I got plants because I read this book called How To Grow Fresh Air and it shows the top 50 houseplants that are good for removing various chemicals that are commonly found indoors such as formaldehyde, ammonia and other chemicals. NASA had used plants to create a livable environment in space.

I'm not really a plant person but I find plants have a certain energy that I like. They are life forms even though it may not seem like it because they are so quiet.

* * *
I plan on having an apartment warming party. I haven't had a party since I was in elementary school for my birthday. I think my last party was in grade 6. I only invited 6-7 kids. I don't know why I didn't invite more but I guess maybe my mother didn't want too many kids over. I invited the most popular girl in my class and she bought me a curling iron. I never used it.

I hope that I have a good turnout. I invited friends from my various social groups. Friends from improv, my book group, work and my miscellaneous friends. I want to see them all merge as part of some social science experiment.

* * *
I'm having problems with my Cogeco bill. Cogeco is a company that provides internet. I had internet installed right away at my place because I wanted a digital phone. When the tech installed the internet, I gave him a cheque that covered the internet for a month and its installation. I was told to do this when I placed my order.

I received my bill about 1.5-2 weeks ago and saw that it didn't show that my cheque was received. I checked my bank account and saw that the money was withdrawn back in August. I called them up Monday and apparently they never received it. The cheque had my old address on it so they checked to see if the money went to my parent's account. It did not. I was notified that I was to contact my bank so they could track it. I will have to call on Friday as it takes a few days to do.

I don't think the tech stole the money since I wrote the cheque to Cogeco. I figure there must have been some mistake in their billing department. I think I will try to get a free month or 2 of internet for my trouble. I might as well benefit from these incompetent jerks' errors.

The Harsh Reality of Singledom

Greetings and Salutations,

In this post I will be discussing singledom and its harsh reality.
I have for the most part of my life been single. I have had a couple of relationships that were over 8 months. One being for over a year I think. It was my first relationship and probably my worst!

Most times I date someone and it lasts for 3-4 months.

Many people seem to think that being single is great or they will tell me how important it is to be able to be by yourself.

Let me tell you it's not fun. It's not fun to always look to yourself to figure out things. It's not fun to go to social events by yourself. It's not fun during Valentine's Day. It's not fun when you're always surrounded by people who are in relationships. It's not fun knowing that you essentially are facing this life alone.

Let me also tell you that I think it's not fair that someone like me has endured years of suffering as a single person. I am proactive in my dating life but no one I find is compatible for my personality. I don't think it's fair that people younger then me find someone and are happy. I don't think it's fair that some of my older friends have found each other in their early 20s and they are still happily married.

I think this whole being single is good for you because you get to learn to be alone is a myth. I can have my solitude and still have someone. I don't need to be alone to figure out who I am.

I don't mean anything. I'm not loved. I'm not important in anyone's life. I'm nothing.
Love from my mother or my friends doesn't count. The love you get from someone when you are in a relationship is unique and I don't have it.

I usually like to be optimistic but I'm forced to accept that I perhaps will be a spinster and that if I haven't found someone by now, I may never. I'll always be this amazing people who never found someone.

My Experience with Ortho C Lenses - Part 2

Greetings and Salutations,

I have been wearing my ortho c lenses for a few minutes a day up to 4 or 5 times a week. I thought these lenses were supposed to improve my vision to -4, however I was to wear them to help retain and stabilize my 2 diopter improvement.

I went yesterday for a new lens. I was only given one for my left eye. Apparently getting a new lens helps to improve both eyes. I thought that was strange but it does make sense since your eyes work together.

I did improve one line (based on the Snellan chart) and I will be receiving a prescription for -4.5 this week. It's not much of a change but at least it is something.

A Flurry of Anger

Greetings and Salutations,

This week I have noticed an unusual amount of anger from people. It all started Sunday at my company soccer game. Where I work, there are different offices. One is in Mississauga, another in Windsor and one here in Burlington. We had a soccer game this Sunday against the Mississauga folks. We didn't have a ref and this probably was where it started to go wrong. The other team was taking this game way too seriously and they were constantly making calls against our team such as the goalie was too far out of his crease or that we were offside. This eventually caused a meltdown that involved uncalled for shoving that potentially could have lead to an actual fist fit had some people not attempted to stop this. It was decided to take a time out. The President of the company showed up at this point.

On Tuesday I went to the grocery store to purchase various items. I was nearly done and was in the bread section when I heard some woman yelling at these women. From my understanding it sounded like these women bumped into this woman and this woman didn't think their apology was enough. I think the women that bumped into this women were Muslims as well.

Another incident of anger occurred on Thursday at my office. Someone forwarded some email that showed how the people in the middle east had created their own winter wonderland. The caption, which I guess was created to incite anger in the viewer, was stating that this is how they are using the money that is generated from the rate increase in oil. The person who forwarded this email said in this email, "Fuck Arabs".

The final incident of anger I experienced in my apartment this morning. It was coming from down the hall. At first I thought it was either one of those yapper dogs yelping or some human having a freakout. It turns out it was a woman having a freakout. I heard words along the lines of "How could you bring her in...". I am guessing perhaps she caught her man cheating on her. I really can't say for sure but having someone have an emotional freak out like this just made me rather uncomfortable.

I really don't know what is going on with people this week. It seems like there is an unusual flurry of anger going on. You know there is this popular belief that Canadians are polite, but as a Canadian, there are many rude and ignorant Canadians. I choose to debunk this myth of Canadians being polite. We are just as fucked up and ignorant as anyone else. Away with this squeaky clean image! This week has showed me how emotionally immature people can be.

Wonderings

Greetings and Salutations,

At my current employer, there are various departments that have moved and my department is one of them. We moved from the office to another location that is about a 5 minute drive. My small department did not particularly care for this move. We routinely go out for breaks together and we began chatting up with a couple of guys from the old office. One person in our department, a lesbian, has an ex girlfriend that is working in the same building that we just moved into. We had found out some guys were attempting to hit on our co worker's ex (which they didn't know was her ex or that she was a lesbian).

So this topic that is not about me, leads me back to me. My dilemma is this. Why is a lesbian getting hit on more then I am, an attractive single woman? I have to be honest with you beloved audience but the truth is I don't get hit on very much. This question has plagued me for years. Why do I not get approached very often? The best answer I could come up with is that I am probably so attractive and intimidating. I know that despite the fact that I am brimming with confidence, I am just one of many in the sea of sexy.

But let's be honest, I really don't like to think I'm intimidating. I have my fears and insecurities that come and go just like everyone else.

If I reflect upon my body language and my personality, I think I probably come off as either aloof or as someone who doesn't take bullshit. And perhaps this is what the male species finds intimidating about a personality such as myself. This issue perhaps may never be solved. The fact remains that the male species are a simple lot and the female brain is best not suited to analyze.

Living on My Own

Greetings and Salutations,

I have officially moved into my new apartment on Friday night. I had my Last Supper with my parents and slept over in my new place. I used to have a desk but I got all new furniture and now I don't have a desk. At least not yet. In my previous desk, I had 4 drawers where I kept things such as my financial information, random papers, markers, old health cards and drivers licenses, my firearms handbook and my underwear.

For years I never questioned why I put my underwear and socks in my desk drawer because I did have a mirror dresser, but I believe a year or two ago I wondered why I would put those intimates in such a none intimate object of furniture.

So now that I don't have a desk, I am forced to put my financial information, random papers, markers, old health cards and drivers licenses, my firearms handbook and my underwear in either my dresser or mirror dresser.

* * *
I went out on Saturday by myself to Ikea and purchased a bookshelf. It's large and I managed to only fill half of it with stuff. I had difficulty getting the bookshelf into the car and I had to place it diagonally. I also had to lay flat the passenger seat and also I had to pull the driver's seat all the way up. It was not easy driving back home with the steering wheel practically right up my nose but luckily I am only a 5 minute drive.

Also nobody from Ikea was helping me to load these heavy and long boxes.
Thanks Ikea!

It took me several hours to assemble it and I had to do the backing but since I had no hammer, I decided to stop at that point and I thought perhaps my father would help me. I had placed the backing on the shelf and I noticed how the backing fit nicely on the one side of the shelf but the second piece was not. I figured this was just the way Ikea designed the bookshelf. Afterall it's Ikea and it was made in Poland. I also thought it would have been so much simpler if I had bought the wood myself, cut it and screwed them together. I find assembling Ikea is too complicated. I must have been assembling this for at least 6 hours.

So the next day my parents came over and my dad nailed the backing to the shelf and when we stood it up, we noticed that the holes on the one side of the shelf weren't lining up properly. It turns out that I had placed the one piece backwards. I was rather pissed and went to my balcony to gather my thoughts, thoughts such as "Fuck you Ikea" and "Fuck you fucken Ikea" and my favourite "Cocksucking Ikea".

I went back in and we took out some of the nails from the backing and underscrewed the bottom and shelves. It was rather difficult to get the piece out and it was also difficult getting it back in but after much yelling between my parents, it managed to get successfully put back together.

My Experience with Ortho C Lenses - Part 1

Greeting and Salutations,

I have been interested in improving my vision for several years now. I have researched lasik and ortho k but neither appealed to me. I had stumbled to a web site that offers an alternative to the above methods. The web site is called Reversing Nearsightedness. The person who created this technique is John William Yee and he calls this methodology Orthoculogy or ortho c for short. It is a natural form of eye therapy. I had purchased his book and I actually got to order my lens through him. He is located in Toronto.

Ortho C are semi hard contact lenses that you wear a few times a week for under 15 minutes. The book outlines the specifications for the lenses. They are also plain lenses in that they have no prescription.

Two weeks ago I went for my fitting and this Sunday (July 29) I went to pick them up and I got to try them. I only wore them for about 2 minutes. He first made me wear them on one eye at a time and then I got to wear them on both eyes. The lenses made me tear up but he did tell me that that would go away after wearing them a few times.

After wearing them individually on each eye, he checked my acuity. I got to rest my eyes for a few minutes and then I got to wear them on both eyes together for a few minutes. He had me look outside and scan various images. I looked at objects nearby and far away and kept shifting and moving my eyes at the various distant objects.

He tested my visual acuity again with the eye chart and I noticed that there was an improvement. My myopia is moderately high and so with the first time looking at the eye chart, it looked quite blurry. After my second time wearing them, the blur noticibly improved.

My prescription is -8.5 in my right eye and -8 in my left eye. After those few minutes of wearing these lenses, my vision now is -6.

I chose to start using contact lenses because I will now need to start wearing a weaker prescription and since my prescription will change frequently, it is easier to get new contacts rather then keep going to get my glasses changed. It felt weird to be wearing contacts again because I used to wear way back when I was in high school.

Mr. Yee has used these Ortho C lenses on the Toronto Police Department to help them pass the visual acuity test.

I will be receiving today or tomorrow a prescription for -4.75 so I look forward to wearing the lenses again once I receive this new prescription.

Moving on Up

Greetings and Salutations,

I am officially moving out of the parent's house. I have a 2 bedroom apartment in the Burlington area. I have essentially lived in the same house for 28 years with a 4 month stint living on my own in Yellowknife. I'm looking forward to moving out. There was a moment that I thought how I will miss my parents but that moment quickly faded away as I began to think about how this is a significant moment for me as an aspiring adult.

I went furniture shopping yesterday and during the week I went out with my mom a couple of times to get stuff for the kitchen like glasses and pots and pans. I had agreed with my parents earlier that they would get me a mattress and new bed for when I moved out. They now want to spend more and get more things for me. We went shopping yesterday for furniture. I ended up picking out a leather sofa and chair, a kitchen table that matches the sofa set, a memory foam mattress and a bedroom set. I had to argue with my dad that I wanted to pay for my bedroom set because I didn't want them to pay for everything.

The whole point of moving out is to be independent. I don't mind if they get me some stuff as a gift but my dad was insistent on buying me more things. He said I should buy the tv and dvd set as well. I wanted to wait for that stuff since I wasn't planning on getting cable right away as I do not watch much tv. My parents were willing to spend $10,000 on stuff for me and I told them that I don't even expect to spend half that. I have to buy my own stuff. My dad thinks I'm being stubborn but it just is too weird if they buy everything for me.

I now have to find a roommate. I am showing my place to someone tomorrow. I am a bit concerned. I don't expect to find someone until September and the worst case would be finding someone for October. I want a female roommate because if I get a male roommate, I would be tempted to get one that is attractive and then I'll want to bang him. If I were sharing a place with more then 2 people then I wouldn't mind a male because then my libido would be diluted but if it's just me and a guy... I most likely want to bang him or at least think about banging him.

Slightly drifting into adulthood

Greetings and Salutations loyal readers,

It is a beautiful breezy day today. Normally it is humid.

I am planning to finally move out of my parent's house. I have looked at some places and found one that I like. I have one more that I need to view before I make my decision. I will either be out in August or September. My parents are driving me nuts. They don't bother me much. I usually come and go as I please. Maybe when I was a few years younger my mother would ask me the next day where was I if I stayed out late but I usually reply that I was out. Yeah Mom do you really want to know that I was late having sex with my 'special friend'. I do have a social filter!

It's time to fly the coop.
* * *
As an improvisor and one that is involved in being funny, there are periods in my life where I don't feel funny at all. I feel like I have lost all ability to make jokes. I think it's part of the creative process for me to lose all interest in comedy. It's also pretty tough when a portion of your self identity is linked to traits such as being funny and intelligent and then finding that these traits are just not there. It brings forth questions about my self identity and involves me assessing my self and my concepts.

I do believe breaks are necessary but it's just weird.

Another one of my favourite activities that I had lost motivation for was that of sexual intercourse. It has been a month but I feel my libido returning.

Happy Canada Day

Today is Canada Day.

Canada is celebrating 140 years of independence.
It's a time to get drunk,
A time to go fishing.
A time for friends.
A time to get yourself knocked up... come on think about how many April babies there are!

Go Canada Go!

Boredom Rant

Greetings and Salutations,

I'm going to be complaining in this post. I generally do not like to complain but I feel that this is something I must express.

I'm am becoming increasingly bored with my life. I take responsibility for my life and I do not blame anyone. I'm so bored with my job. I'm tired of where I am and I want more out of my life. I'm tired of my menial jobs and I want to do something else but I am just not sure. I'm keeping my options open. I could go back to school but I just don't know what to do. I also have been thinking of doing stand up comedy again but I just don't know if that's right. I have been thinking about how can I incorporate improv into stand up. I think it's been done.

I'm just a barrel of confusion.
I'm bored.
Bored fucking bored.

I can't go on like this.
I must break out but sometimes I just don't know if I can.

More lessons learned from my vacation

Greetings and Salutations,

I have never really understood why people drink. It was always something that never made sense to me. It seemed self destructive. And now I finally understand why people drink. I have become enlightened to the virtues of alcohol consumption.

Greetings and Salutations,

I have returned from my vacation in Vancouver. I had moments where I was stuck by the simple acts of kindness of people towards me. Some girl in my hostel who helped me with bringing my luggage to my room which also was the same room she was in (it had 16 beds) as I had 2 suitcases (one was camping gear and the other being my clothes, toiletries, etc) and it was difficult carrying both. In the second hostel I stayed in, some guy bringing up my luggage up a flight of stairs. Some woman encouraging me and offering me advice while I was doing the Grouse Grind (i.e. climbing the Grouse mountain).

For me I have spent most of my life in great fear of people who I meet and I have spent many years breaking down my walls and becoming more confident in myself. I am greatly saddened that there are still people who are mean in this world. It doesn't make sense to me but it gives me some hope to see people showing some kindness to others.

Threat

Greetings and Salutations mon amies,

I am currently vacationing in Vancouver. I am exhausted because I went from my hostel on Jericho Beach all the way to Stanley Park and then I circled the entire perimeter of Stanley Park. I don't cycle and when I had to go up a mini hill or up the bridge, I would walk up with my bike since it was taking up too much of my energy. I'm in shape, but not in shape to cycle well.

I went to Vancouver Island on Monday morning and took the ferry. I went to Nanaimo and Tofino. I arrived in Tofino on Monday night and I stayed at a small hostel. Our host said it was karoke night and we all went to the pub where they were having it. Usually when I meet people for the first time, I am polite and quiet and I appear reserved. However, as someone who performs, I do have the capacity to be outgoing and out there. I sang 3 songs and my first was Baby Got Back. The crowd was a young fun crowd and there was a mini dance floor. After I was done, everyone was telling me how awesome I was and one cute guy who was staying at my hostel from Finland said it was the best karoke performance he ever saw. I was dancing while I was singing and the hostel host and a guest came up and danced along side me.

All right enough about me talking about how awesome and surprised they were by me as I appeared to be that shy, quiet girl. I don't know why I get quiet and shy when I meet people for the first time but it never made sense to me to be out there. I wish I was more outgoing but my shy demeanor does not keep me from going after the things I want.

The host seemed smitten with me and intrigued by my dual nature of shy and outgoing persona. As much as I love getting complimented, I reach a point where I feel it's enough. I don't think much of my karaoke as it is just karaoke.

So on Tuesday I had surfing lessons for 2 hours and practiced on my own for a bit. It was quite challenging but I did not manage to stand on the board. My arms and pec muscles are so sore. I think I will look into surfing in Ontario. I'm thinking there might be some pool that generates waves that let's one practice surfing.

I drove back to Nanaimo and waited for 30 minutes for the next ferry to Vancouver. There was a delay in the arrival. The ferry's speed slowed down and the captain or the captain's bitch (i.e. the second in command) announced that there was a situation which was why we were slowing down. The captain's bitch announced again another 10 minutes that there was a situation. Then the captain come on a few minutes later to announce that there was a bomb threat on Horsebay (i.e. where the ferry docks). I was calm at first but then I started thinking about how I didn't want to die yet. Most of the time I thought things would be fine but every once in a while I thought about that movie Titanic. This was only my second time on the ferry. A ferry newbie such as myself shouldn't be subjected to this.

I think perhaps this was a false alarm and we all arrived safely.

Not Much to Say

Greetings and Salutations,

I think I have reached the pinnacle of my self expression. I have not much to say in the world, to the world.

It's all bullshit and I wonder if my expressing myself just makes the world a more confusing place to live.

Everyone lies to some degree, whether to a partner or to themselves.
Everyone has some degree of selfishness, whether they are aware of it or not.
Everyone has some degree of negativity that skews their perception of events.

* * *
I don't know if I need to be more confrontational with people. I think due to my belief in non violence, it has led me to become weak. There are people out there I should beat up but I don't because I don't believe in violence. I don't want to get involved in drama. I only speak up when I feel necessary but I generally don't fight as much. I don't need to be dragged down by people's low emotional intelligence and their inability to deal with their internal strife.

I don't think I am complacent but sometimes I think maybe people need to see someone get angry at them. We are such a permissive society. Some people probably need to hear that they are acting like an asshole or a whore or too selfish. Sometimes we all need a stern warning about our behaviour.

Unamused

Greetings and Salutations,

I have regretably joined Facebook even though I did say that I would consider joining 6 months from now (I said this probably last month). Have I succumbed to social pressure or curiosity? Most likely curiosity. I am not impressed with this. The initial adrenlin rush of adding friends to my list is dissipating. As a pragmatist, I see very little use in how this tool would be useful in my life.

I did find my ex best friend whom I 'dumped' about 8 years ago because I felt our friendship was going weird. I have heard from her. If I were to rekindle a lost friendship, that one might be the one I think has some hope.

A friend from high school had several other people from high school on her list. Many of these people I didn't care for and I although I do not harbour resentment, I do not care to add them to my friends list. The reality of life is that we will encounter all these people and only a few we find some connection.
I looked at the friends list of several other people and they had over 500. I could not imagine having that many friends. Although I tend to get along with most people, I find it very difficult to have a geniune connection with most people. Why? I don't know. I know that I am different from people but I don't think I'm so unique that I can't relate to people.

Actually I don't think it's difficult for me to have a genuine connection with people. I think for many people, they have difficulty being open and honest with others because they are not open and honest with themselves.

I have also noticed many of the women under 30 use pictures of themselves with their wedding dress on. I wonder if it's because a)this is the only good picture of themself that they have available b)it's the most recent photo they have or c)because their identity is largely tied up with the idea that getting married is a sign one has made it.

I believe the answer is c. I believe for many of these young women, their self concept is largely defined by the fact that they now have someone and they place such value on marriage.

I am sure for some Facebook has been useful in their life. Facebook your time is ticking.

* * *
Many of my readers may not know this however I plan on taking a vacation to Vancouver this year from June 1-10. So if you are attracted to me, that would be a good time to 'accidently' run into me in Vancouver and you can profess your love for me and how amazing you think I am.

Yes this is one of my personal fantasies. A really tiny portion of my soul - probably .07% believes that some guy I know secretly harbours feelings for me but is too afraid to tell me in fear that I will break his heart by telling him I'm not interested. The odds of me telling a guy I am not interested and breaking his heart is quite high.

But the point is that I still harbour this fantasy of a guy I know harbouring feelings and then expressing them. It's not really the breaking his heart part that is my fantasy.

Anyways, I plan on white river rafting for 3 days. I really want to do that and everything else after that will be icing on the cake.

Help End the Tiger Trade

Greetings and Salutations fellow e-friends,

I received an email from the WWF (world wildlife fed, not the wrestling organization) that has some petition to sign for helping the tigers. Also, you can upload your picture to be apart of a tiger mosaic. If this petition idea appeals to you, please forward the link to your friends. Here's a blurb from my email:

"The tiger is one of the most revered, feared and popular species on Earth. Yet it is perhaps the most powerful symbol for all of our planet's endangered wildlife.
Fewer than 5,000 tigers are now found in the wild and in just 7% of the habitat they once occupied. But it gets worse... a thriving black market for tiger skins and bones threatens to wipe out wild tigers altogether.

We need your help to create the world's largest photo mosaic of this endangered species and help put an end to the tiger trade."

You can help by clicking here

An announcement

Greetings and Salutations,

I have decided to make a change of vast consequence. I have decided to renounce my nerdiness. I am sorry that I have to leave behind the nerd community of which impacted me greatly and which I have impacted as well with my love of all things accurate.
I have decided to leave my nerdy ways to pursue the path of divadom. I now consider myself a diva.

My transformation into divaness begins with the renunication of my past - that of nerdiness and high intellect. I am bringing with me to this divafication process, my committment and dedication. My transition from nerd to diva will be a gradual process but being a diva is my true calling in life.

I bid the international nerd community adieu and I say bonjour to the diva community.

I would like to thank the diva community for accepting me and who will play a pivotal role in my divafication process.

Product Review

Greetings and Salutations,

Today, as I sit here in my underwear, I will write a review about an allergy product that I have been using that I believe has been useful. Since 2003 in May I began experiencing allergies that would appear in the spring and fall. I later got tested and the test did not reveal what I was allergic to. I've tried various antihistamines and they don't seem to be strong enough and I find them to be costly.

I discovered this allergy medicine entitled Nasaleze which is manufactured by Vivitas, and their site is vivitas.com. It is a powder that you spray into your nose. Usually one spray in each nostril should be good for the day. Certain days my allergies were really bad and I probably sprayed up to 6 times total. The max dosage is 8 sprays. On my worst days, I found the Nasaleze to be 80-90% effective.

It claims to be a natural product and uses cellulose. It acts as a mucous like lining that filters out pollen and dust.

The powder does become a bit hardened when it interacts with the mucous. My only complaint with this product is that because the powder hardens a bit, it feels like there is booger in your nostril.

The product says it contains 200 doses which they claim is good for 30 days, however, I have had this for more then 30 days and I think most people would not use the full dosage to get positive results.

Overall if you suffer allergies, I recommed using this product.

We also do not use both nostrils when breathing. We use only one nostril and then it periodically switches.

Here Comes the Quadratic Equation

Greetings and Salutations,

There was this article in the paper that featured the picture of the Google founders. They are only 6 years my senior and I found one of them particularly cute - Sergei Brin. The other guy, Larry Page was cute but more geeky cute. I don't know what their marital status is, however, I would be interested in dating Mr. Brin. He's a math and science guy so he would sure be interesting to be nerdy with.

I declare that I would like to be...
Mrs. Google