My First Meetup

Greetings all,

I had my first meetup with my new group. It went well. I had 18 people show up, including myself. I was feeling a bit nervous but I hope that eventually I'll relax more into my position as being the head organizer.

I had some people ask me why I left the previous group I was in. I figured this would come up and I really didn't want to get too much involved so I ended up talking neutrally about what happened. I didn't really go into how Aimee punished a new organizer or how someone came to my blog to comment on how I was missing from the group. I just said that I didn't find the joke about the titles made was funny and I felt very strongly about it and felt that those titles was ego driven and not about being a team player since I feel we are all contributing to making the group a success and no one should try and be better then anyone, especially if they have done nothing for the group. I also mentioned that we have hung outside of meetup so I truly felt they had become my friends and was let down that they couldn't respect my feelings.Many people understood where I was coming from and I think for me, this validated my experience and made me feel relieved that I wasn't crazy for feeling the way I did about the titles. I was truly friends with the wrong people.

I know for me, I can't be friends with people who can't respect my feelings on something where I felt strongly about. I made it clear too to people who are still in that group that I don't want them to feel like they have to pick sides. Its up to them to go to meetups they want and I just have to focus on making my group a success. I can't go around trying to be like anyone else and have to be myself.

I told some of the people in my book group about what happened. They are all older and more experienced in life. One woman was very involved in many groups in her life and was telling me as soon as people start taking on these professional sounding titles, it usually ends up with the group falling apart. I think her groups had actual objectives so I am not sure if that will be the case for this group since it's just a social group. The group might end up becoming more successful without me. I know I was in a meetup group where it was about Angels and the woman Yvonne was very ego driven and narcissistic. She attracted many people to her meetups. Her group has grown since I left. She ran her own business and did Angel readings and she ended up dumping negative energy on me when I had a private consultation with her. I met other people who saw what I saw (her ego) and left her group so in my mind, I felt her days running that group would be numbered but it seems to be going strong and she has more members. So just because organizers are jerks, doesn't mean groups can't grow and appear successful.I am still carrying some hurt from the experience but I think this was good for me. I need people who are more evolved and not so egoistical and insecure. I need people will respect my feelings, not just dismiss them and belittle me.

It seems like making the most painful decision is sometimes the best decision.