Love Triangle

Greetings all,

I have some drama to report in my personal life. Since I'm not into drama, I choose to no longer engage with the situation. Anyways, I am an assistant organizer for a group on meetup and it's for introverts. It's been interesting to meet so many introverts but the problem that happens is that they are too much like me in that they can be too quiet. I don't like being the one that initiates things but with a group that has the tendency to be quiet, sometimes you have to initiate conversations. Anyways sometimes it's easy to get people talking, especially if some of us are more extraverted introverts. I find some of them are extremely introverted whereas I am more balanced but still an introvert. I don't feel a need to talk all the time but then I am a doer so I would rather get active.

Well here's some of the drama. One guy I have a crush on. There really aren't too many guys that I like anyways and I use meetup for socializing, not pick up. He flirts back with me and one time tried to kiss me outside of my car as I was getting into my car. The problem with that was that I had the organizer of the group in my car as I was going to drive her home and I don't think it's appropriate to kiss someone for the first time if there is someone else there. So I didn't reciprocate the kiss. The organizer and I are friendly and she went with me to Scranton.

I went out with a few people from the group on Friday, outside of meetup and we hung out at Tim's and then they closed and we decided to go to someone's else. I cuddled the girl of the house as we have some bond. If we were lesbians, we probably would date. Then one of the guys left and it was the three of us. I cuddled with the guy I had a crush on for a while. Now I know I probably shouldn't have but I know in my mind that he probably isn't right for me. As my friend told me afterwards, he would be a Mr. Right Now, not Mr. Right. But I knew that and was hoping maybe to date for a bit to see where it goes. The thing with crushes is that sometimes they never lead anywhere but sometimes they may. He seemed to enjoy it and I did too. My friend was amused by our cuddling

The next day there was a meetup to go dancing. I organized it because my birthday was a few days ago. A few of us went and by the end of the night four of us were left. The organizer is pretty so most of the guys in our group think she is hot. I think she's pretty but I wouldn't call her hot. I'm not threatened either by her looks because I am fairly confident in myself. I know I was never a conventional beauty and I don't really think of myself as pretty but I know I'm hot and I think highly of myself. There's always going to be some girl out there who is prettier then me that all the guys flock to. Guys can be dumb sometimes. They get distracted by the pretty. Now the organizer isn't mean or anything. She's nice and quiet. I have nothing against her. I think she just needs more spunk, more fire. I think many people in that group need spunk and fire.

So the guy I have a crush on admitted while we were cuddling the other day that he likes the organizer. I didn't know what to make of that since I look at what a guy does, not what he says. He flirts with me a lot and was cuddling with me. Not saying there's a relationship and I don't feel entitled but there is obviously something there. Why are you cuddling me then if you like her? I wasn't sure if he was afraid to admit maybe he had a thing for me.

So he dances with me a bit and then dances with her a bit but probably more with me. And I thought at the time, maybe to not make her feel left out. At the end of the night they separate from the group and go off dancing. They are maybe 6 feet away from me and I was getting angry at the both of them. I kept it cool and then eventually they came back and I felt like leaving since it was late anyways. We did and he offered to drive us home. I said I'd just take the streetcar home because I didn't want a drive from him after how he acted. So he dropped her home and the other guy in the group was waiting with me at the streetcar stop.

I ended up talking the next day with the girl whose house we went to and let her know what happened. We hung out later on in the afternoon and she had people over and we had dinner. We talked about what was going on. I had thought about quitting and leaving the group because of this but I knew I couldn't just be impulsive and react. I do have to talk to the organizer first.

I think by the end of the night I probably felt more anger to the guy. I will have to speak to the organizer because maybe she just went with him and he was the one that 'dragged' her away from the rest of us. I definitely believe that women have to stick together and not let a man ruin their friendship but I will probably talk to her on Wednesday as I am a little angry and don't want to explode. Or maybe tonight. She is obviously aware of the flirting and thought maybe there was something going on. Last week some of us met up for coffee and we had learned they went to a movie together. Maybe she thought it was innocent but he probably is looking for more and is probably playing the both of us.

This guy is clearly a player and I definitely will not hang out with him anymore outside of the group. I know for me, I want a guy to pursue me, not be interested in more then one person. I want to be #1. I want someone who only has eyes for me and me only.

I don't think the organizer is interested in him so I now just think he is a bone head.

I've had this happen to me with my first boyfriend and I found out after things didn't work out that he was interested in my friend and tried to hit on her. This was the summer after we finished high school so I think what this guy is doing is just so high school and juvenile. I think guys don't realize that women talk to each other and some of them aren't stupid and trade information.

I certainly believe women have to stick together. Chicks before dicks is what I say. We can't let men get in the way of the friendship.