Dream

Greetings all,

This is my first post of the new year. Happy New Years! I had a dream on the Epiphany that I went to the Summer Solstice event in New Mexico and my dad was there. I took that as a sign that maybe I should go to the Summer event since I went to the Winter event.

I had another weird dream the other day where Will Smith was wanting to have sex with me. He was rather persistent and I had told him no. I was tempted but I told him no since he was already married. I wonder what this means. I'm not really attracted to Will Smith in real life but find him funny and was a fan of his show The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air.

I was telling my friend that now that I've gone so long without sex that I've hit that threshold where now I don't obsess about it or care for it. I just give up I guess in my search. What happens is that I hit a certain point where I can't take having it anymore and then I have dreams about it, which further aggravates my sexual frustration.

I do not like being sexually inactive. My body is hot and I am just getting older. It's a waste that no one is taking advantage of it. I'm just not living to my sexual potential.

I've tried looking and the process is as frustrating as finding a boyfriend. The truth is men don't just fuck anyone. Men just act like, we'll fuck anything that moves and that is bullshit. They have to be drunk probably to fuck anything that moves.

I'm currently on eharmony for 3 months but I might just cancel it as I feel I can't be bothered to find a man. I have other things to concern myself with and I've lost a lot of motivation in finding someone. It just seems like an impossible task.